Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Beam Me Up, Great Hair & "Darn, It's Cold Out Here!"
Speaking of the weather, in the "You Couldn't Make This Up If You Tried" department, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi had to cancel a speaking engagement in D.C. Monday evening because her flight couldn't get into town because of the weather. I don't have to tell you that it was about 20 degrees with a horrific wind, causing a wicked wind-chill effect, not to mention the blinding snow. So, what was the speaking engagement for that Pelosi couldn't get to because of the frigid weather? It was a global warming rally. Edward Markey, a Democrat from Massachusetts and House Select Energy Independence & Global Warming Chairman (Does he actually fit all of that on a business card?) was also supposed to speak at the rally, but he too had to cancel because of the freezing weather. So, here are these environmental nuts standing out in a blizzard warning the rest of us about global warming.
This is like Al Gore's worst nightmare come true, isn't it? Also, Monday night, Pelosi's face was frozen, but that had nothing to do with the weather.
It always looks like that.HEALTH NEWS: Dr. George Steinhauser, a chemist at Vienna University of Technology, has finally solved the mystery of where bellybutton lint comes from. NO, again, I'm NOT making this up. He analyzed over 500 pieces of lint from his own navel over three years and discovered it doesn't just come from clothing, but also from dead skin, fat, sweat and dust. He says to prevent getting bellybutton lint, you should wear older clothes that don't "shed", get a navel piercing, or shave your stomach hair. HEY, I'VE GOT AN IDEA. HOW ABOUT TAKING A SHOWER EVERYDAY??! But here's a grown man, a doctor, no less, sitting around studying bellybutton lint. This is the kind of vital research that President OH-bama's stimulus package will soon be funding nationwide.
The Governor who won't go away, Rod Blagojevich has announced he has a book coming out. He says the book will expose the "dark side of politics". I never knew there was a dark side of politics, did you? Up to now, we've only seen the good side. By the way, I don't think there's any truth to the rumor that he'll include a special bonus chapter on hairstyling tips.
If the book is ever made into a movie, I know who would be perfect to play his part. I wonder where Bobby Goldsboro is these days.
On this date back in 1991, Los Angeles police severely beat Rodney King. The incident was captured on amateur video and sparked riots in the City of Angels. King was eventually arrested and charged with impersonating a pinata.
March 3, 2008, one year ago today, another chapter in the political correctness gone mad book. Internet giant (the) Google started giving free telephone numbers to homeless people, so they would no longer have to rely on friends and relatives to take messages and therefore not miss out on potential work opportunities. We have, over the last decade or so, elevated the "homeless" to near royalty status. I'm not talking about the people who have truly run into bad luck and found themselves on the street and who are genuinely trying to get back on to their feet. I'm talking about the people who have CHOSEN to drop out of the world of responsibility and exist on the streets. You're going to give these people free telephone numbers?? "Hello, you've reached Harry. If you're calling to offer me a job, press one. If you can spare some change, press two......" "Hello, you've reached Bob. I'm not home right not, because I DON'T HAVE ONE!!!"
One final note, Scotty from Star Trek would've been 89 today...........but he's dead.
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