More in the Morning

Friday, August 13, 2010

Walk For The Animals, Calling The Police ON The Police & The World's WORST Blind Date

If you caught Debra Joseph's last visit to More In The Morning, then you know that we are gearing up for this year's Walk For The Animals in downtown Fredericksburg. Debra is the Director of the Fredericksburg Regional SPCA and she reminds us that this will be the twelfth annual walk, all to benefit the Fredericksburg SPCA. Once again, there are some great prizes this year, but the whole is so much fun, the prizes are almost secondary. It starts on Maury Field, downtown, at 8 A.M., and now we need YOU to come out and walk with us. Yes, I'll be out there along with my wife, Rae, Braden Smith, our Thunder crew and once again, a special guest appearance by Watson The Wonder Dog. Not that it's a race, in fact on the contrary, it's a leisurely walk through downtown, but last year Watson took the word "leisurely" to new heights. If you were there, you know we came in dead last. In fact, by the time we got back to Maury Field, I looked like Tom Hanks in Cast Away. But Watson assures me that this year, he'll do better. As you can see, he's training hard.

By the way, Watson More now has his own Facebook page. Check it out when you can and become a friend.

Let's go to the news:

Eaton, Ohio........Police in Eaton got a frantic 911 call from this woman.

She's Andrea Elliot, and she called 911 and told them to hurry and send the police to rescue her because some police were trying to put handcuffs on her and arrest her for being drunk and disorderly. The 911 dispatcher explained to her that they don't send the police to stop the police from arresting people.

WELL, THEN, WHAT GOOD ARE THEY??!

I guess I understand. I mean if they sent police, then they'd have to send MORE police to stop the police from making the arrest. It could go on forever and ever.

In the end, it all worked out pretty well because once they got the handcuffs on her, it turned out she liked it.

IN THE "WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS DOESN'T NECESSARILY STAY IN VEGAS" DEPARTMENT: Alex Buehler of Eau Claire, Wisconsin pleaded guilty to bigamy after his wife, whom he married in Las Vegas three years ago, discovered his first wife on Facebook. Worse than that, she also discovered that he was still married to her! In court, Buehler told the judge that he had meant to divorce his first wife, but he "lost track of time" and it just "slipped away" from him and he never got around to it.

HE ALSO MEANT TO MOVE TO UTAH, BUT HE LOST TRACK OF TIME AND IT JUST SLIPPED AWAY AND HE NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT.

I would think this dope's defense would've been he thought weddings performed by bad Elvis impersonators didn't count.

Finally, you have GOT to love this guy.......

This man, with the Derek Jeter ("Where am I") expression on his face is 43 year-old Andrew Palmer of Baltimore, Maryland. He likes to eat in fancy restaurants, but he doesn't like to pay the tab. Many of us feel that way, but he actually did something about it. Palmer devised a little scheme in which he would go into a restaurant, eat and drink aggressively, and then when the bill would come, he would fake a seizure and be taken away to the hospital, where he would be looked over and then, of course, released. This is something you might get away with once, maybe twice is you're lucky, but Palmer did it eighteen times in restaurants throughout Baltimore and beyond, even travelling as far south as Florida to sample of of their eating establishments.

His antics finally caught the attention of Maryland Assistant State Attorney Scott Richard, and of course, it didn't take long to mount a case against him. He was arrested and sentenced to eighteen months in prison.

In this guy's defense, did anyone stop to consider that he WASN'T faking it? Maybe he's just been eating in the wrong restaurants.

The good news for this guy: For the next eighteen months, he will be getting FREE MEALS!!!!!!!!

...and when he does get out of jail, good news for you ladies out there: HE'S SINGLE!!!!!!!!!! But I wouldn't recommend going out on a dinner date with him.

posted by Denny # 3:10 PM 0 Comments

Friday, July 23, 2010

Open For Business In Auburn, California, Danger In Disneyland & Aquapalooza

It's hard to believe that it's Aquapalooza time again, but sure enough, the world's largest water party is back tomorrow. We have a change in venue this year. Tim's I in Dunfries is the site for this year's event. Our headline performer this year is national recording star Matt Stillwell.

And, of course, I'll be out there along with all the other Thunder air personalities, the Thunder crew, and hopefully, YOU'LL be there too.

A programming note: on Monday morning's show, in the eight o'clock hour, I will be joined in the studio by 9-year-old Megan Robertson and her mother, Heather. Megan (from Stafford) made national news last week when she had the opportunity to get up onstage and dance with Tim McGraw at Jiffy Lube Live. It's a great story. Megan has had some health issues in the past, and when she was rehabilitating, she would listen to Tim's music. So, this was truly a dream come true for her and we'll get the whole story on Monday.

Twenty-nine-year-old Travis Kevie of Newcastle, California is a very enterprising young man. Unfortunately, his enterprising nature got him arrested. Kevie broke into a shuttered, close-down bar in Auburn, California, called the Valencia Club, reopened it, and started selling drinks to unwitting customers. Auburn Police Detective Jim Hudson became suspicious after reading about the Valencia Club's re-opening in a local Auburn newspaper. The article even featured a picture of Kevie and identified him as the new "owner/operator.

Not only had Detective Hudson had previous run-ins with Kevie, but he also happened to know that the Valencia's liquor license had been surrendered. Sure enough, when Detective Hudson went to the bar to investigate, he found it was open for business with customers at the bar. Kevie quickly went from behind the bar to behind bars.

So, here's just another example of small business being stifled by the government.

Here's a story I had to laugh it when I read it this morning: Disneyland has closed down it's Alice In Wonderland ride while workers install new safety equipment recommended by the California work-safety inspectors. Have you ever been on the Alice In Wonderland ride?

You have better odds of being injured in Disneyland or Disney World by a senior citizen driving one of those Rascal scooters.

And yes, it's true. The Golden Girl, Taylor Swift has been nominated to be inducted into the Bowling Hall of Fame. The Bowling Proprietor's Association recently announced the list of nominees who, according to the association, helped contribute to the enduring popularity of ....................bowling. Aside from Taylor, some of the other notables nominated include Bill Murray, Jeff Bridges, Jimmy Fallon, Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian (those last two make even less sense than Taylor Swift). You are invited to vote online at http://www.gobowling.com/ . If Taylor wins, watch for Kanya West to interrupt the induction ceremony complaining that Beyonce is a better bowler.

What's next for Taylor Swift? Nomination for the Nobel Peace Prize?

posted by Denny # 6:45 PM 0 Comments

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Wine And Whiskers, Bubble's Thoughts & The Y

He's a great American, an incredible musician, and a legend in the country music world, and he's coming to Fredericksburg. I'm talking about the great Charlie Daniels.

He'll be appearing at Celebrate Virginia Live this Friday night. I've been giving tickets away all week, and tomorrow morning, another chance to win tickets when we play More's Mystery. Tomorrow, we'll be looking for a person......a person who could easily be described as the Jerry Springer of his day. I'll have two more clues for you tomorrow morning a little after our 7 o'clock news.

It's hard to believe, but it's Wine & Whiskers time again, and again this year, I'm happy to be hosting the festivities at Lake Anna Winery this Saturday night. Not only is this a great way to spend a Saturday night, but it's a chance to help support the Fredericksburg SPCA at the same time. There'll be wine-tasting, great food, a live band, a silent auction, and all in all, a lot of fun. I hope to see you there. For more information, go to http://www.wineandwhiskers.com/ .

In case you have not heard, the YMCA is now officially known as just "The Y". The Chicago-based, non-profit organization announced Monday that it is changing it's logo and name to "The Y". Research showed that the name "YMCA" was confusing to most people, and that most people usually referred to the organization as "the Y" anyway. For now, the new name applies to the group nationally, with individual locations still being referred to as YMCAs. However, the transition is under way, and within five years, the 10,000 YMCAs across the country will be known simply as "The Y". Why is this important and why is this good news? Because now, that annoying Village People song will be 75% shorter.

I've talked about the Jackson family on numerous occasions. They are without a doubt an iconic family in our society, and Michael was without a doubt one of the greatest entertainers of all time. However, this doesn't change the fact that the entire family is nuts. Here's the latest:

In an interview with News of the World, La Toya Jackson claims Michael spent thousands of dollars in trying to teach his pet chimpanzee, Bubbles........to talk. This is NOT hard to believe. La Toya says Michael spent thousands of dollars on research to see if Bubbles could undergo a medical procedure that would give him the ability to speak. She says, "Michael wanted to give Bubbles vocal chords and asked doctors, 'Can I give him an operation so that I can know what his thoughts are?" But after spending an enormous amount of money and years of research, he finally gave up on the idea. Besides, he probably figured if he really wanted to know what Bubbles' thoughts were...........

........he could just talk to La Toya.

posted by Denny # 5:48 PM 0 Comments

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Back To Work, The F.B.I. & A Six-Year-Old On The "No-Fly" List

It's back to work this week after a very nice and very relaxing week off. My thanks to Brian Strobel for filling in.

Coming up tomorrow morning, joining me in the studio, Vicki "The Victorious" Berkshire from right here in Fredericksburg.

At the age of 29, Vicki's dream is to be a MMA cage fighter, and indeed, this Saturday night, she will step into the cage for the very first time at The Virginia Sports Complex in Ruther Glen. Hopefully, we'll find out a little about the thought process that went into making the decision to do this.

Remember, Blake Shelton is coming to town this Friday night, and every morning this week, I'll have chances for you to win tickets. Here's the first of three clues to tomorrow morning's More's Mystery: This left-handed smoker once worked as a limo driver while pursuing an acting career.

Watch for the More In the Morning weekly poll question coming soon to this website.

We have a special announcement to make about my buddy, Kristin Nash. We'll be making that announcement this Friday morning during the Walk Down Music Row segment.

In the "better late than never" department: My thanks to the Federal Bureau of Investigation at Quantico for inviting me to participate in their F.B.I. Citizen's Academy. If you're like me, you probably didn't even know there was such a thing. The F.B.I.'s Citizen's Academy is a special unit for civilians. It's an eight-week course which breaks down some of the myths of the F.B.I., and gives people like me a little behind-the-scenes look as to how the Bureau works. It's a very "hands-on" course. I'm very much a homebody kind of guy. Give me my wife, my dog and some wine and I'm a happy guy. So, when the F.B.I. called, I really didn't know if I wanted to commit myself into taking the course. But I must tell you, and I mean this, it was one of the most fascinating things I've ever done in my life. It was interesting, riveting and, because it was so hands-on, it was a lot of fun. I met a lot of great people too. Unfortunately, this is not something you can sign up for. You sort of have to be nominated to get in. If, by chance you ever have the opportunity to do it, I'd HIGHLY recommend it. Again, my thanks to everybody at the F.B.I.

While I was out last week, Britain's Sun Tabloid claimed they got a sneak peek at the secret divorce deal between Tiger Woods and his wife, Elin.

It is a record settlement for a celebrity divorce case with $750 MILLION going to Elin. However, in return, she must agree to never talk about Tiger or their marriage, even if he dies first. If she does, she forfeits the money. She also gets custody of both kids, and to keep them away from porn stars, Tiger is not allowed to bring any single woman into the children's presence, unless he is engaged to marry her.

My question: Knowing what we know about this guy, what woman would be dumb enough to marry him? Heather Mills, maybe.

Finally, an off-beat story about a 6-year-old girl, who for some unexplained reason, has found herself on the U.S. Government's No-Fly list. Dr. Santhosh Thomas of Cleveland, Ohio, along with his wife and six-year-old daughter, Alyssa were getting ready to fly from Cleveland to Minneapolis, when the ticket agent at the Continental counter informed them that Alyssa was on the No-Fly list. The agent suggested they call Homeland Security to straighten the matter out. When Dr. Thomas did that, he received a letter from the federal government confirming that his six-year-old daughter WAS indeed on the No-Fly list, and that her file WOULD NOT change.

The F.B.I. will confirm that a such a list exists. However, for security purpose, they will not discuss who is on it or why.

In the F.B.I.'s defense, and as someone who flys alot, I'll say this: I know many frequent fliers who would argue that ALL six-year-olds should be on the No-Fly list.

posted by Denny # 5:46 PM 0 Comments

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Wrapping Up Some Loose Ends, The End Of The World & Not A Leg To Stand On

I will be off this upcoming week. Brian Stroble will be filling in for me.

I do want to thank everybody who came out to Flip Flop Friday this week in Colonial Beach. It was another great party, and again, our thanks to our good friends at Corona Light and Corona Extra................and of course, thanks to Dawn and Stephanie, the Corona babes!!

Also, thanks to everybody who came out to my live broadcast this afternoon at the grand opening of Chancellor Tire & Auto. This was one of the most fun and most successful remotes I've ever done. The folks at Chancellor know how to do it up. We drew a huge crowd. In fact, we went through more than 350 hot dogs in about 2 hours. Thanks again to all of you for stopping by.

There was a story out of New York City about 4 years ago that made national news. Some of you might remember it.

Twenty-two year-old Dustin Dibble had been on a drinking binge when he decided to take the subway home at around 1:30 in the morning on April 23, 2006. It would later be discovered that his blood-alcohol level was 0.18 - twice the legal driving limit. There he was, standing on the subway platform waiting for the train. He was so bombed, he lost his equilibrium. He fell off the platform and was run over by the train. Unfortunately for Dibble, he lost his leg in the accident.

Here's where it starts to get a little nuts. Despite the fact that Dibble was smashed, he turned around and sued the MTA (Metropolitan Transportation Authority) for negligence. Incredibly (or maybe not so incredibly), he won the case and the jury awarded him $2.3 million.

This is very reminiscent of the well-known case in which a woman ordered a cup of hot coffee from McDonalds, spilled it on herself, then turned around and sued the fast-food restaurant and was awarded millions of dollars. Most people have heard that story. What a lot of people don't know, is that the award was appealed, and although the woman did get a lot of money, it wasn't millions.

This Dustin Dibble case is very similar. There was no negligence on the part of the MTA. Dibble was rip-roaring drunk. Subsequently he fell off the platform. It was proven that the driver of the train reacted as quickly as possible. Everybody knows that you can't stop a train on a dime.

Here's the good news: On Wednesday of this week, a state appeals court threw the ENTIRE case OUT. Dibble gets nothing. The case was thrown out based on "impermissible speculation and insufficient evidence".

So, every once in awhile, common sense prevails, and now it won't cost the taxpayers of New York and arm and a leg.

In this guy's defense, I will say this: If my name was Dustin Dibble, I'd probably walk around drunk most of the time too.

On a more upbeat note..........

Frank Fenner, a microbiology professor and a top scientist in Australia, credited with helping to wipe out smallpox, says the human race will be extinct in 100 years.

The professor says, "In one hundred years, we're going to become extinct. The world's population will reach 6.9 billion by the end of 2010, and the race simple can't survive. More people means fewer resources. There will be a lot more wars and they'll all be over food."

I'm not all that worried about this. If there is any battle the U.S. will not lose, it's a fight over a meal.

Talk to you in a week.

posted by Denny # 5:20 PM 0 Comments